Tag Archives: quadriplegia

Dispelling the Myth!

I wrote last night’s blog from a place of extreme anger and frustration, having been questioned about Tracy’s place and the ethics of fundraising. I decided this morning to re-write it, more from a factual place than an angry place. Despite the many stories and rumours, here are the facts.

  1. Cars: We are in the process of selling both of Tracy’s cars. They are both over 5 years or more old and were paid for outright when Tracy was in a better financial position. She was planning to drive them into the ground.
  2. Collingwood: Tracy has never owned a place in Collingwood. She was only ever renting. It was one of favourite places to be with the boys. It was sad to have to give up the rental property after the accident.
  3. House:  Tracy’s house will be going on the market imminently. While Tracy would love to continue living here, it’s just not a good solution giving the changes that would need to be made.
  4. Private School: The younger two boys have gone to Bedford Park Public School now for two years. Christian, the oldest also started out this Fall at Bedford but once Crestwood found out about Tracy’s accident, knowing how it would affect Christian – they immediately offered him a bursary!  Thank you Crestwood! !
  5. Employment: Tracy was not working and therefore does not have benefits, private healthcare insurance or long-term disability. She had been looking for a job for several months, and was planning to get back to her job search once the kids were back in school this Fall. But sadly, things changed…
  6. Ex-husband: As it stands now, Tracy and the children are not able to  rely on him in any way for any kind of support. Sadly, he is indifferent to the fact that the mother of his three children is now a quadriplegic and he actually adds more stress to our family with his shenanigans. He has publicly scorned the fund-raising efforts and created his own blog to try and dissuade people from donating  to Tracy’s Trust Fund.  Donation that ultimately benefit his kids. Who does that?
  7. Tracy’s care once she leaves Lyndhurst: Consider this…Tracy cannot do ANYTHING for herself. She can’t get out of bed, she can’t hold a fork, she can’t go to the bathroom, and trust me when I tell you that if determination alone could will her to do any of these things – she would! While it’s still early days, here’s just a preliminary list of the expenses she faces:
    • 24 hour care (PSWs) (approx $150k+/annually) ,
    • special wheel chair that she can use with subtle head movements or breath (approx 50-100K),
    • House – we need to find or renovate a house for accessibility (with lift for bed/bath, ramps, wireless and speech activated controls) (approx LOTS$$)
    • Physiotherapy and occupational therapy, (??$$)
    • Accessible van ($60k+)
    • 3 kids to look after – a nanny that drives ($40K/annually)
    • Prescription meds for kids
    • Unknowns…there will be many of them…

To those of you who have donated without any hesitation we thank you!  Truly!

Reality Check at Lyndhurst

Tracy’s first week at Lyndhurst started with an amublance ride from Sunnybrook Hospital. It was a dopey drowsy entrance on Monday October 17th,  followed by high fever and a urinary tract infection, mystery meals, introductions to therapists, psychologists, doctors and nurses, a tour, a new daily routine and many more “firsts.”

Among the many things that I want to share with you, the most important of them is the impact that being in a facility geared to spinal cord injured patients has had on Tracy, and all of us. Everywhere you look there are wheelchairs – most of them have people in them, but there are some sitting in hallways, some motorized, some stand-up, some manual, …all kinds of wheelchairs. They are everywhere you look. “It” doesn’t escape you. Everyone of these people has a story to tell. They are all recovering from injuries of various kinds.

But the most poignant of comments from my sweet sister is one that she made today while being interviewed by a very kind reporter from CBC News named Natalie Kalata. In a very powerful conversation she had a tearful moment and said, “all I want to be able to do is to brush my hair out of my eyes, to hug my kids, to feed myself, to be able to use my hands!” What she didn’t say to Natalie but has shared with others this week, is that she is resentful of the “parapeligics.” She has assessed the situation at Lyndhurst and has seen that the majority of patients are paralyzed from the waist down. How lucky they are, right? Interesting that we would think this way, isn’t it? Sadly, it all becomes relative. Relative to not being able to move any part of your body from your neck down. Hands!? Just hands.

The Power of Yoga – Namaste to Moksha Yoga Uptown!

This morning the amazing members like Holly & Kelly, and the staff like Daniel, Paul and Anna at Moksha Yoga Uptown hosted a hot yoga/pilates fundraiser class for Tracy. I have to confess that I wasn’t much feeling up to it, as yesterday when I visited with Tracy we didn’t have the best exchange. She seemed angry and mean, and I was hurt and felt sorry for myself and unappreciated. But I went to the class this morning because I wanted to say Thank You!  What I didn’t expect was the love and compassion that overpowered me while in a VERY hot room with people I barely know. As I went through the motions of the poses and flows, I experienced waves of emotions – sadness, anger, joy, sadness again and in the end an awesome sense of  hope and peace.  The energy of the people in the room today filled me up with the courage and strength to believe and move forward. I left behind the hurt and disappointment.

Stay tuned

Natalie Kalata is a journalist who works for CBC News and learned of Tracy’s accident from her producer Allen. Allen works out at Extreme Fitness Dunfield Club and saw the posters for Tracy’s fundraiser class on November 4th, and realized this was a story that needed to be told. Natalie met me at the Moksha studio this morning and then followed me to Lyndhurst to speak with Tracy. Natalie was patient and compassionate. She is to be commended for her ability to “connect” with Tracy while asking some very tough questions. But reporters are human too, and Tracy’s heartfelt retelling and responses had Natalie immersed in the emotion of the moment.  She paused the camera to wipe away both her tears and Tracy’s. She thanked Tracy and reaffirmed what we all already know. She said “Tracy, your strength and resilience is unbelievable. You are inspiring. Thank you for speaking with me today.” The story will air on CBC news Monday October 24th at 6pm and 11pm. We’ll also post a link to the online story once it goes live on the CBC News website.

Lights, Camera and Action

I too thanked Tracy for allowing me to barge into her room unannounced and ask her to do an interview this morning. You see, I was afraid that she might decline, since we had not prepped her for this and it was last minute. Not Tracy! This the best part of today’s blog. Tracy said to us. “I loved being in front of the camera, tell Natalie to come back and do part two when I’m home for Christmas. In fact, come back anytime as it makes me feel special and important!” Classic Tracy.

Reminders:

1. JOIN US – Group Fitness Fundraiser for Tracy - Dunfield Club – Friday November 4th, 9:30 – 10:30 am Sign up

2. VISIT TRACY wants VISITORS!!  Especially weekends. Click here to sign up

3. WRITE – the old fashioned way – to Tracy. She doesn’t get to read your posts. Send cards, notes and pictures to ATTN: Tracy Kyne, 121 RANLEIGH AVE, TORONTO ON  M4N 1X2

4. GIVE –You can donate online with PayPal or visit any CIBC branch and tell them you’d like to make a donation in Trust for Tracy Dort Kyne to this account: #00002 / 60-47599. You can also write a cheque addressed to Joan Dort (in trust for Tracy Kyne) and mail it to the address above on Ranleigh.

Remember to cherish every breath and every movement! Think of Tracy the next time you brush your hair out of your eyes or away from your face. And please share Tracy’s story by clicking on the Twitter and Facebook buttons below.

Luv, Les